Note 002: You either break up or get married

Ever think of how many people in your life have started out as mere strangers to you? For me, thats probably the sneakiest part about romantic relationships. This someone who was absolutely nothing in your life, this someone who you knew absolutely nothing about and felt absolutely nothing for... all of a sudden becomes your entire.freaking.life. You fall. You commit. You learn every little thing there is to know about them. The important: their values, their ambitions, their family background. The unimportant:  the way they walk, talk, their favorite color, their favorite music. The downright ridiculous: the way they like their eggs in the morning, the way they act when they are beyond wasted, or pissed on the road. You learn, you invest, until you know every scar, every expression, every signal. 

And when what always happens, happens, you are forced (or choose) to walk away from every thing you've learned, and every thing you've known. After driving such a long road together, you are suddenly right back where you started. Strangers, again.  This probably sounds melodramatic on my part, but I SWEAR all my personal issues aside, it’s such an interesting thought: How much we invest into a bond, and how easily it is broken. 

Ergo,

Here is one of my absolute favorite videos. With close to 13 million views on Youtube it is not a surprise that Wong Fu Production's Strangers, Again has hit a little too close for comfort for a number of people.
I can't really determine whether it is because it reminds me so much of home, ( Strangers, Again is shot in San Diego, I believe) or because I have seen those exact same scenes play out in my own life. ( The cut fight scenes?! Brilliant. )  But all my dramatics aside, Wong Fu Productions just does such a kick ass job of describing the stages we go through the second we decide to fall in love.  Showcasing not only a love story, but THE love story. The love story that we can all really relate to. The love story that doesn't have a happy ending. 

"Do you realize that there are only two options for our future together? It’s either we break up or get married. What do you think will happen if we don’t end up together? Are we gonna hate each other? Think well keep in touch?  

I think that if life separates us and we end up in totally different places, i'll always remember when our paths aligned for this period of time. And i'll be thankful for that, And hope that wherever you are, you’ll be thankful too. And I think thats the best that we can wish for."

I take that back, maybe every love story does have a happy ending. Because sometimes... 

Sometimes the happy ending is just moving on. 

:)

Now playing: Taylor Swift

Needless to say, if I was super star Taylor Swift at this point in my life I’d probably have another hit single in the works, or maybe an entire album. There was a number of changes in my life in the past few months I did not at all expect, people who vowed to always be there, simply woke up one day and decided to walk away. And others who I haven’t talked to in so many years have come crashing back into my life without warning. With not only myself, but a number of my girl friends experiencing a lot of trying times (to say the least)  in the same department, I couldn't help but think... 

How peculiar it is that something we consider such a defining moment in our lives, something as special and momentous as falling in love, is an event that happens nearly everyday to everyone. Engrossed in our over eagerness to play out our own personal music videos, it’s so easy to drown in our dramatics. We forget that nearly half of the world is falling in love, breaking up, getting married, having kids, dying, crying, living in the exact same moments as we do.  

Fortunately or unfortunately, Life and Love make no exceptions. A normal girl from a small town or an internationally famous country pop star who’s made millions chronicling her experiences both get hit. Sometimes I am actually tempted to grab a pen and paper and jot down the musings of whats-left-of-my-heart in hopes to be able to sing them to the millions of teenage girls who will swear on One Direction that they have felt the exact. same. way. Of course this pop star fantasy is nowhere near true, I am not a gorgeous 5’10 blonde with crazy guitar skills and even crazier relationship statuses. ( Okay, maybe I can contend the relationship status part. ) But alas, I am not Taylor Swift and so I must live vicariously through her from album to album.  So now I will  leave you darlings with her prologue message from her latest album, “Red” :

“There’s an old poem by Neruda that I’ve always been captivated by, and one of the lines in it has stuck with me ever since the first time I read it. It says “love is so short, forgetting is so long.” It’s a line I’ve related to in my saddest moments, when I needed to know someone else had felt that exact same way. and when we’re trying to move on, the moments we always go back to aren’t the mundane ones. They are the moments you saw sparks that weren’t really there, felt stars aligning without having any proof, saw your future before it happened, and then saw it slip away without any warning. These are moments of newfound hope, extreme joy, intense passion, wishful thinking, and in some cases, the unthinkable letdown. And in my mind, every one of these memories looks the same to me. I see all of these moments in bright, burning red. 

My experiences in love have taught me difficult lessons, especially my experiences with crazy love. The red relationships. The ones that went from zero to a hundred miles per hour and then hit a wall and exploded. And it was awful. And ridiculous. And desperate. And thrilling. And when the dust settled, it was something I’d never take back. Because there is something to be said for being young and needing someone so badly, you jump in headfirst without looking. And there’s something to be learned from waiting all day for a train that’s never coming. And there’s something to be proud of about moving on and realizing that real love shines golden like starlight, and doesn’t fade or spontaneously combust. Maybe I’ll write a whole album about that kind of love if i ever find it. But this album is about the other kinds of love that I’ve recently fallen in and out of. Love that was treacherous, sad, beautiful, and tragic. But most of all, this record is about love that was red.”

Leave it to T.Swift to sum it all up darlings,

Love is a ruthless game unless you play it good and right. 

OOTD: Candycane Rockstar

Sorry it took so long to upload darlings, blame my lagging macbook and even laggier (is that even a word?)  internet connection. One of the most comfortable outfits I've put on lately. You want to brighten up your complexion or your spirits? Wear red! You want to hide tired or puffy eyes? Rock some faux glasses. My peppermint tank top as well as my super comfy boots are from Forever21, black leather shorts from Greenhills, and my watch is from Michael Kors. Seriously, the perfect chill outfit. Shorts and black combat boots always look kick ass without trying too hard. Just tie your hair into a messy bun and you're good to go! 

Papercuts

We all get hurt.

Some people attack you with their words, some people attack you with their fists. They bruise and batter you. They don't stop there. They're not satisfied that your heart is black and blue, they make sure to take down your pride, ego and self worth too.

But some people, the really really sneaky ones, they chip away at you. inch by inch. A passive aggressive take on the jab hook straight combo. Its so tiny you don't even notice, you don't even feel. They don't knock out your teeth, they don't leave you with bruises..

They leave you with paper cuts.

What is it with paper cuts? We don't necessarily see them once we get them. Sometimes we don't even notice we get cut. How long does it take before it hurts? How long before we actually notice that something hurts. And at first glance, there is no evidence. There is no mark, there is no blood. Until we pin point exactly where and there it is, a thin silvery slice. Napakanipis pero napakahapdi at minsan mas malalim pa sa pasa.

How many people in your life wound you in that way? Chip away at you little by little you don't even notice? So subtle, so innocent, they might not even notice.

Sometimes the bruises are better. The blue and black. Something you can see, something to remind you of hard they hit, how strong they wounded you. The bruises are easier to remember. They're the wounds we can't forgive. They're the concrete reasons to bail.

But how about a paper cut?
How many paper cuts can you forgive?
How many paper cuts are too much?
How many paper cuts before we say enough is enough?
How many paper cuts?
How many?

OOTD: My favorite red cardigan